When a couple is having issues, they can seek professional help to try and resolve them. There are many places they can go for help, and therapy is a good option. Couples therapy will help them see what is important in the relationship and help them learn how to compromise.
There are a few couples therapy skills you can use to strengthen your relationship. In this article, we’ll outline eight skills that will be super beneficial for your relationship.
Couples Therapy Skills You Should Use
In couple’s therapy, you will meet with a licensed marriage and family therapist. This person is trained to resolve problems and improve satisfaction within a relationship. They will discuss a specific problem with you and allow you to work together to solve this issue.
They will begin to problem solve based on the specific situation, and the goals for you and your partner will become clear. As a neutral party, your therapist will help mediate your issues so you can meet these goals as a couple.
As a couple, you will learn to appreciate each other once again, and the couples therapy skills below will help you get past the hard times. If after reading this article you find that you still need help, visit this site.
1. See Through Your Partner’s Eyes
It is very important that couples create an empathetic understanding of their partner. In most cases, it is the men that need to do the most work, but this can benefit women as well. Partners can develop a love map. This map will allow them to enter their inner world.
They can talk about what they wish for in life, the things they are worried about, their current and future dreams, any goals they have, and what brings them joy in life. Each partner needs to share this. This will allow you to get a better understanding of the thoughts and feelings that each other have. This will also help you deal with situations that can become stressful later on.
This will also give you some of the skills that you need in order to deal with conflicts. It is also suggested that couples can improve the way they communicate with each other. It is recommended to use open-ended questions. This should be done often so that they can stay in touch with the changes in their life.
You can turn this questioning session into a game if it makes it more enjoyable for you. You will be able to learn how to see things through each other’s eyes, and you will also get to know each other once again.
2. Learn Your Love Languages
Marriage counselors suggest you take the time to learn your love languages. Many people speak a different love language, but there are five basic principles that everyone abides by. These five languages are words of affirmation, acts of service to each other, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch.
Many people think they know the love language of their partner. They can determine what makes their partner happy and what makes them feel special. Often people just mirror the way they feel love and take actions that meet their needs. This can lead to disappointment in a relationship if you two aren’t speaking the same love languages. If one partner does not feel like their needs are getting met, this can lead to issues.
In order to learn your love languages, you can use the 5 Love Language Quiz. This way you can learn what your partner wants and how you can meet these needs. You can then work out ways to meet each other’s needs so that you are both happy.
3. Ways to Repair Conflict
Any couple needs to learn how to repair conflict so that their relationship can bring them happiness. Your issues need to be laid out bare so that these negative things do not impact them any longer.
The relationship will then enter a repair phase so the couple can find solutions that will work for them. They may even try out some resolutions that may not end up working out. They should tell the other how they are feeling, they should stop and say they are sorry, and they should even recognize when they are becoming defensive.
You should write down what you have heard your partner say during an argument and work on a way to repair this. You should also talk about triggers to emotional responses. This way, future arguments may be able to be prevented, and you can have a talk instead of fighting.
4. Open up Emotionally
Most people assume their partner knows that they care about each other. There are times when they are going to need to hear it. They need to tell each other their feelings are important and their relationship is meaningful.
They need to focus on resolving the issues rather than focusing on these issues. In order to stay close, a couple should have a date night or even some alone time at home whenever possible. They should often cuddle on a regular basis, watch TV together, or any other intimate activity. This will help the couple stay close and connected.
5. Take a Break
There are times when emotions will get high. If a person is too frustrated and they cannot think straight, they need to take some time and just walk away from the situation. There are times when taking a break will be the best thing. Taking a break will allow partners the chance to calm down.
They will also have the chance to get away before they say something that they will regret. Couples need to develop a code word or a signal to show they are getting stressed and they need a break. They should not just walk away. This can create more trouble.
The couple can then take a break for 20 to 30 minutes, and at this time, they can calm down. They can focus on what they are doing in the argument and think of some ways to solve it. Sometimes just calming down is enough to help the situation.
6. Self Care
Relationships can offer companionship and someone to depend on. It is unrealistic to depend on another person to have every need met. This can even be unhealthy. A partner cannot be expected to be a lover, friend, confidant, coach, parent, and much more.
That is a lot of pressure, and they will fall short. Most people will be disappointed, and this will not help the relationship. A person needs to take care of themselves. They should take on yoga or enjoy some time taking a walk.
Some alone time will benefit the relationship. There needs to be a balance in the relationship so that each partner can develop a healthy relationship.
7. Improve Communication
In order to express thoughts and feelings, a couple needs to learn how to improve the way that they communicate with each other. Communication is important for intimacy.
A couple may need to learn how to be supportive of each other when they speak. They need to learn how to become active listeners. They also need to speak with empathy when they respond to an issue. This will help out with all areas of the relationship.
8. Promote Positive Strengths
Each couple has things that they are good at. Focusing on these things will also help take the focus away from the problem areas and allow you to find something positive about each other. It will remind you why you fell for each other. This will also help you stay positive even if you’re fighting or making each other angry.
Partners should take turns doing something that pleases the other one. This will allow them to become more emotionally invested in the relationship. This can help you learn how to appreciate each other once again and will allow you to redevelop positive feelings.
You should also take the time to think about the good qualities of your partner. You should then share this with each other to help recreate some positive feelings, especially if the relationships have been troubled in recent times.
Want More Relationship Advice?
Relationships aren’t easy. Even though the movies would lead us to believe that a marriage or relationship should be effortless, this isn’t true. Maintaining a relationship takes hard emotional work. This doesn’t mean that a relationship isn’t fun, but it requires effort to keep your partner happy.
With these couples therapy skills, you should be able to do just that. If you need any more help with your relationship, be sure to check out the Relationship section of our website!