Time is a significant matter, and how we organize it is one of the most important decisions we make. It’s also a limited resource, therefore we all need to ask ourselves the question what is something I truly care about and brings me the most joy? I bet we would notice a difference between the answer to the aforementioned question and how we actually spend our time. Probably no one answered those perfectly ironed shirts or seamlessly swept tiles are their priority, yet much of our time is wasted doing exactly that.
An Australian nurse named Bronnie Ware spent several years caring for patients in their last 12 weeks of life. She documented their dying epiphanies into a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing. The 5 most common regrets she observed were:
- I wish I pursued my dreams instead of doing what was expected of me
- I wish I hadn’t worked so hard
- I wish I had the courage to speak my mind
- I wish I stayed in touch with friends
- I wish had let myself be happier
As no human being is perfect, it is expected that all of us have some regrets, but the key is to have as few regrets as possible, and as cliché as it sounds, to live life as if we would die today. That way, we would only focus on things and people that make us happy, pursue our truest dreams and not conform to the expectations of other people.
Accept the Reality.
What’s done is done, but it doesn’t have to be the end of the world. You aren’t obliged to spend your time hating yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and press rewind, regretting every decision that leads you to where you are. If you learned some kind of lesson you shouldn’t regret anything. After some time passes you will realize that you’re still breathing and going on with your day even though you thought moving forward wasn’t possible. Would you be the same person you are today without making any mistakes and falling down? Perspective is everything, and it can make and break your past, present, and future.
Write It Down and Burn it.
Take a piece of paper and write down your emotions towards an event or a person. Don’t censor yourself or suppress how you feel, no one will be judging you. After you’re done, read it as many times as you’d like, until it feels complete, then take the paper and burn it. The visualization of burning what you’ve written is a helpful way of letting go.
Divert Your Mind and Thoughts.
Staying in a negative mindset might be easier, but it won’t get you anywhere, because you truly lose when you refuse to see the positive side of life. Although there will be reasons to regret your decisions, the power lies in your mind.
Make Yourself Busy.
While yourself busy distracts you from whatever negative thought’s you’re having at the moment, it is also a great way to find independence and learn to be your own person.
Share With Someone You Feel Comfortable.
There is an old saying that goes “Problems feel smaller when you share them”, and there’s even scientific data to back it up. A study done by researchers from the University of Southern California has proved that sharing feelings prevents individuals from experiencing heightened levels of stress, and sharing with someone in the same situation provides the best results.
For some people talking about their problems is easy, but for many, it can seem like the hardest thing in the world. They may think that their problems aren’t big enough or important enough, or they don’t want to look bad in the eyes of the person that they’re talking to. The truth is a conversation with someone who appreciates you can be a relief and he or she can help you deal with your difficulties.
Make Time for Meditation.
Through meditation, you can take a stress-reduction break wherever you are. Spending just a few minutes to focus on yourself and how you feel can restore your inner peace. Some apps that can help you through your meditation journey areBuddhify, Jinglow, and MINDBODY.
Exercise does a favor to your body by pumping up your endorphins, the brain’s feel-good neurotransmitters. As you begin to move and engage in physical activity, you’ll realize that you’ve forgotten the day’s problems and concentrated only on the way your body’s moving.